Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Sleepless in St. Louis
Not that I thought this would be easy, but I have to admit I am definitely having my world rocked. It's like staying awake for a week, then someone handing you the keys to a semi truck and saying "Here. Drive this scary vehicle alone from California to New York. Don't fall asleep. Don't let the loneliness mess with your emotions. And be sure to soak in the nice scenery." Don't get me wrong, I love my scenery right now. She is precious and perfect and I love her madly. But this jolt into motherhood coupled with uncontrollable hormone shifts and sleepless nights is not making this easy. I know every new mom goes through this. I think the worst for me is the hormone changes because it alters how I feel on a minute-by-minute basis. And nobody can tell me how long it will last because each woman is different. I can deal with lack of sleep and dirty diapers. I am sure I will be my lighthearted self again in time, and I hope the time is soon. This is the reality of motherhood.